Dear Annie: I've been married to "Nancy" for 18 years. Two years ago, we became involved in youth programs in our community as we have three children. This gave us opportunities to meet new people.
During this time, I noticed Nancy changing. After one meeting, I caught her in a truck with another man. She claimed they were just talking, but I didn't believe her. She consented to a polygraph, which she failed. I then asked her to submit to another with a different tester, and she failed that, too. These examiners have been doing this for over 20 years and both said she is lying.
Nancy maintains her innocence and I'm confused. We attended counseling and got some things worked out, but I simply don't trust her. What is your advice? — Don't Believe HerDear Husband of a come-bucket:
Welcome to the wonderful world of being married to a slut, dude. By the way, what kind of youth program is this? Please tell the world so everyone can steer their children clear of this strumpet haven.
You seem like an uninteresting dullard, so your first mistake was letting your wife meet people who aren't as boring as you. But you did, and she most likely at least blew one of them.
Let me tell you something, friend (and by "friend" I mean "dickwad"): No one has a conversation in a truck unless the truck is moving. If the truck is stationary, someone is having an orgasm, probably all over your wife's face. You talk standing outside of the truck. You go inside to get freaky.
The next time your wife shares a small space with another man and emerges smelling like Axe body spray and sperm, send me the money you would have spent to hire two more polygraph examiners. Then have sex with someone she knows.
11 comments:
You had me at "strumpet haven".
Polygraphs? 2 of them? Whatever, dude. I'm sure there are plenty of places around to hide her dismembered body.
He should have just checked for a jizz stain on that trollop's blouse.
He should use the polygraph guy I hired when Dilf claimed he didn't take the last packet of Oreo Cakesters.
Oh, that Dilf won't ever use that tongue to lie again.
When I ate the last packet of Oreo cakesters, Gindo just beat me with the polygraph machine. Based upon that, a more serious infraction is completely out of the question, truck-based or otherwise.
OK, I'll be the one to tell UberChick she might be the one missing out if she screwed up UberDude's tongue. We were all thinking it.
i need to try these oreo cakesters
Funny stuff. You should go after a letter to Savage Love
That would be funny, except I'm not really sure what you would add. From reading SL, sometimes I get the impression that Dan isn't sure what to add.
I hate when I agree with John.
Nancy maintains her innocence and I'm confused... WOW what a dumbass... No one has a conversation in a truck unless the truck is moving... wow hilarious and LOVE THESE RESPONSES...btw you can still get a blowjob in a moving car that has a stickshift:)
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